I woke up this morning , cats perched on my chest purring so loudly who needs an alarm clock. I had great plans for my day. The sun was finally out after a few days of torrential rain and I had plotted out my next installment of writing to be done on the screenplay I am involved in, a screenplay that tests my very metal. I would get up and then reward myself with watching the Golden Globes. So, I got up and did the usual. Brushed my teeth, fed the now yowling cats, poured a cup of Masala tea and headed to my desk. But I got waylaid. Something tugged on my heart from the inner realms and stopped my trajectory toward the computer.
It was a large purple and white orchid I had sitting in the window. The sun was streaming in behind the spider veined petals and they seemed to be lit from the inside out. Suddenly, nothing seemed relevant at all except to drink in the beauty of the petals and the cosmic design of it’s very unique personality. No orchid is the same. No petal the exact mirror or design. Humans are just like that even if they are twins there is one mole or a different shape to the smile that makes them one of a kind.
Already my day was traveling down a different road. In the past, I had my list, my “to do’s” numbered one through infinity and would start the day by reminding myself what I was up against and then like my exercise regime, I would just do one rep at a time till I was done. Sometimes that would take me till after midnight. But, my life has changed since those days. Living in the flow of life makes living by lists a bit obsolete. And you may ask, ” If you live in the flow how do you get anything done”. Well that is truly a mystery.
Somehow, even when distracted from an original intent to sit at my computer and answer emails, and instead sitting with the orchid as it vibrates its neon colors, as the sun pours in the window one minute, illuminating shapes and hues that I have no name for and then a cloud mutes it all into an impressionistic painting, my vibrational frequency rises to the experience. My field of the heart opens, I am more in a feeling state, feeling my life, I am more joyful and happy. I am changed for those moments I INTENTIONALLY allow myself to “wake up” to what is right in front of me. To slow down to notice life. My heart is met with a kind of energetic communication that changes how I hum through the day. And subsequently, how I hum through my to do list.
I know you. You and I are very similar. We each have a habit of thinking just the opposite: ”If I get everything else I need to do today out of the way I will feel satisfied, less stressed, more productive and then I will have the time to sit and really look at the flowers in front of me, the ones that have been there all the time.” And I am here to tell you that this is an illusion. When was the last time that really did happen in just that way? What really happens is we believe the illusion, start ticking away at a list that is filled with not terribly inspiring things like calling the insurance company, taking out the trash, answering emails, vacuuming, that oil change etc etc etc. And before we know it we have little time left for anything creative, joy filled or contemplative. Right? We are simply too busy to be happy.
Well here is the truth. Somehow, very much a mystery to me (and the mystery is what makes my life worth living), somehow when I am awake enough in my own body and my own intentional life, and I make the room to let myself be surprised by joy, interrupted by the unknown and the unplanned, then my to do list gets done and then some. Because you see, when I vibrate at the level of love and joy, I hum along in an open posture to life, not reactive to it and I draw in a total experience of every thing else humming along and vibrating at the same rate I am: Faster.
Everything is done with efficiency, every call to people who I usually have to struggle with like a credit card person or a tech person for my computer are all in good moods and get the job done for me in a blink. And I just find myself un-flustered, and just a more pleasant person all the way around. Then what happens is I draw in more very pleasant people, more inspired experiences, more surprises to throw me off my game on getting things done and I “flow” toward those new and wonderful interruptions to my day….and it still all gets done because I am feeling happy and creative.
“If you want to make god laugh…tell him your plans.”
And there is a caveat to this truth. Sometimes those interruptions are hard, sad, filled with crisis and a demand to do something that feels entirely unpleasant or unwanted. A car accident, a friend suddenly dies, a husband cheats with his secretary, a foreclosure, lost job, illness. These harder aspects to living still require the very same posture. Move with the flow, feel it all, see the opportunity to be a bigger, better, less reactive you.
And in the contrast of this difficult moment is its opposite: In the pain there is the joy you would rather feel, in the shock is a calm place inside of you that you can reside, in the anger is a compassion available at all times. The bumps and bruising of life is only a contrasting experience that reminds us of what we truly do want, what we are capable of and what we desire. It is our business and our choice to decide where we focus. Do we want the pain or the place of relief.
We are in total control of our experience. If we panic and rush headlong into finding a solution to the crisis we will certainly be met with the same energy; chaos, reactivity and confusion. If we can take a breath and step out of the crisis for one split second and see the other side, see the beauty of our lives, the design, the people who love us and will give a hug freely, the dog still centered and waiting for you, the opportunity to be a stronger version of yourself, then you will find quickly, the appreciation you have for the crisis and the pain. It is a choice. And what’s the worst thing that can happen? Really? You die. Isn’t that liberating.
So. I have yet to do my exercises this morning, make my breakfast and sit to write the next scene. I am a few of hours behind schedule. And that’s ok. I have had such a lovely experience communing with my orchid and my cats and now with you, that my writing will be the better for it. And about those flowers right in front of us. Look around. There are “flowers” blooming everywhere. Those little faces of the people we love, with children inside of them, that just simply want someone to say, “come out and play”. Then there are our dogs who need that brushing we have been putting off or that walk with you, without you being on the cell phone, but paying total attention to this being who is the most unconditional love you will ever experience. Or that clerk at the coffee shop that you have meant to speak to and thank for helping you every day, but you are in too much of a hurry. The trees blowing in a rhythmic dance outside your window, decorated with singing birds that are there for you to notice and appreciate, the feel the water pouring over of you in the shower, the smell of the roasted coffee in the kitchen, it is endless.
Wake up! Are you paying attention to everything around you so that you can then FEEL everything inside of you? The universe supplies you with endless opportunity to stop and smell the roses, hug the loved ones, see, and I mean truly see the sky and breath in this new day you have been given a chance to truly live. This is the only day you have right now. The to do list will wait and in fact it will all get done. I promise.