Paradise: Lost Connection

Oct26

Ok, it has been awhile since I wrote a blog post and it is mostly because I live in a time warp. It might be that living here in Cost Rica when the sun sets and rises at the same time each day you can just get lost in the rhythm. Paradise has it’s own timetable and no matter how hard I try to stay on task, live with my Day-Timer loaded to the gills, I simply cannot do it. I could be on a publishing deadline that feels like the thin line between life and death and find that I have been staring at the Toucans in the tree outside my window for a half hour. Costa Rica is a drug.

So, I thought to write about all the things that can derail you here in Costa Rica. Things like the big weather, car repair nightmares that define what it is to have a car in Costa Rica, living without a dryer and hanging out your clothes for days in and out of rain showers, my addiction to farmer’s markets and even about jellyfish when snorkeling, but alas, I am writing about the Internet. The Internet for us here in Costa Rica is the true test of one’s patience and fortitude. It tests your true metal.

My entire Internet life in the USA was a breeze. If something broke the Genius Bar at Apple did magic in a day. If the Internet went down in the mountains of Colorado it was up in no time. I depended on connectivity like I depended on the sun rising and setting. But, not so, here in a developing country. The Internet, just like absolutely everything else, is subservient to mother nature and repairmen who are never for any reason in a hurry about anything.

We get storms every day. One storm can boot you off the Internet for days. And then there is no talking to your children, no being punctual with clients on Skype, no surfing the web for an answer to how to get rid of ticks on the dog your are fostering, and no watching Netflix and keeping up with your new obsession: Legends. It all comes to a grinding halt. The parrots keep squawking and the breezes keep blowing but that little circle in the middle of your computer screen that keeps spinning and spinning, just keeps on spinning.

So fixing a Wi-Fi tower is not like in the USA. They have to use machetes here. I think you get the picture. So, patience is what this ongoing debacle breeds. You end up having to, by no choice of your own, just allow for the possibility that even if the internet is down, work will get done, people will find you, deadlines will get met and life will go on. Pura Vida.

My IV Drip

Sep24

I had surgery once where I thought the panic attack would kill me before the surgery did. I clung to the nurse’s arm and squeaked out, “I need a Valium”. Now, let me say that I don’t take valium, nor have I ever. But I saw all the shows on TV for decades where that little pill seemed to be all too friendly with women to help them sleep, manage stress or simply just check out from being a Stepford Wife. My nurse said, “Oh, honey, we’ve got something far better than that for you,” as she hooked me to an IV drip and I was out in LA LA land in four seconds.

Costa Rica is my IV drip.

I arrived here in a hurry. I arrived here living a hurried, fast paced type A life. I had no clue how to do it otherwise. And pretty much upon landing, setting my toes deep in the hot sand and sipping agua de pipa, I unplugged from a power source that in almost every way, I had become addicted to.

Suddenly, I was drifting off to a deep sleep at 8pm once the blackest curtain of dark was drawn over the jungle, precisely at 6pm. For a girl who had never thought to see 4am, I was up with the first spark of pink light. My gate slowed, my needs of the day thinned out like plucking weeds from an overgrown garden, to reveal the fact that I could get it all done today, or maybe get it done manana. It did not matter.

Now, five months later, I am not only type B, but I am not concerned with moving to any particular destination in my day. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I work, I see a dozen clients a week on Skype, edit a half-dozen books, write my own stories and yet there is no inner coil of tension from the decades of living in urban life and off a grid of energy that never shuts down. I can be in the thick of writing a scene and not lose my place when I pause to watch the scarlet Macaws fly over. I just take the bliss of that moment and pump it all into the next sentence I write.

Here there is no need for Valium, or vodka tonics, or having to read Eckhart Tolle for the hundredth time on how to be here now. I am here now. Nature requires it and her grid of energy is so powerful that unless you let her reboot you, you will simply go back to where you traveled from.

Nature is my drug of choice. Nature never leaves me with a hangover in life. She simply returns me to the rhythm that is innately humane.

Becoming Uncivilized

Aug12

I grew up in the shiny years of American life. Cut my teeth on James Dean movies, the Mouseketeers and a boat load of pie in the sky thinking. I was there when the indoor shopping mall was a concept that would define Americans. I was there when I Love Lucy started being broadcast in color and the fable of Cinderella started dictating the entire value system for girls growing into women. Consumerism, telecommunications, fast food, stress and Starbucks became a definition for living the American dream.

And, admittedly, I went after the picket fence, higher education, financial success and bought the whole nine yards of civilized American life, hook line and sinker. But what I did not know when I became one of the sheep, following the herd, was this: There are profound tradeoffs for having a platinum Visa. Following the norm, the subliminal and not so subtle dictates of a society means that you do not follow other things, namely; intuition, spiritual values, living in the rhythm of nature and following the heart. The two value systems are like oil and water.

But I hear you say: “That’s not true at all! You can rack up credit card debt, climb the ladder of success, shop till you drop and watch reality TV till your eyeballs fall out but you still can be living a passionate, joyful, stress-free and creative spiritual life”. Not.

And although I opted out of the normal American life decades ago, downsized, chose art over money, valued my spiritual beliefs over collective thinking, I still had no idea what tradeoffs my soul was really making to live inside of a culture that is so mesmerizing. I had no idea what an illusion it all is.

When I came to Costa Rica I arrived as an observer. An observer of a culture not my own. An observer of nature and how subservient to the natural environment we all are. But what I did not know is how the constant presence of nature and beauty can change how you vibrate, think, feel and act. In the USA I was cut off from my natural rhythm, I was a late to sleep and late to rise person, jolting myself into a day with coffee. I was bombarded 24/7 by cell phone towers, electromagnetic overload, unnatural light, traffic, stress and the power coursing through city life left me sleepless all too often. Take all that out of my equation here in a third world country and what’s left is…space. Energetic space. Room for the heart to breath.

So the observer in me watched people living an unhurried life, eat large meals in the morning, take naps in the afternoon. Indigenous people here are never, ever in a hurry and where I am on the Pacific coast there are no traffic lights and simply no traffic. You have to go to bed with sundown and get up at sunrise. Nature gives you no choice. The animals are all living their true nature. Just watch the iguana, the parrot, the cicadas, monkey or jaguar to know that they are true to what makes them unique. Simplicity is Costa Rica. A downsized, small footprint is all there is room for in the jungle and if you listen, watch, feel and smell the reality all around there is no choice but to adapt, flow and merge with the pace and the values inherent in the natural environment.

So people ask why I am still here in Costa Rica, why I stay, why there is nothing about the civilized world I miss (except ice cream). My answer is that living a more uncivilized life has returned me to myself.

No Hair, No Clothes, No Shopping?

Aug2

What’s a girl to do in Costa Rica?

Ok, admittedly I cannot tell you a thing about much of any of this but to say, forget hair, forget clothes and forget shopping. Costa Rica brings you back to the basics of just about everything. Sure you can get an $8 haircut but don’t expect to want to leave the house anytime soon. Hair color? Lemon juice and the brilliant sun. You can find clothes but sarongs suffice and as for what Americans call shopping, the local Feria (outdoor market) is the only place to find organic food, local jewelry, an imported bra or two, (no kidding) and biodegradable detergent. When in Costa Rica it is all about local.

And unless you live on a huge pension or have a trust fund forget about anything imported like, anything in a box, wine, liquor or shampoo. Quinoa for the healthy is $12 a box, cheaper American shampoo is $25 and a bottle of imported Milagro Tequila can run you upwards of $80. So I get to put my money into the local economy and eat, dress and look like someone who cares about the land, the people and the economy here. I have learned about odd vegetables I have no idea what the names are, I get to help support a family who picks lychee nuts from nearby trees and sells them outside of the bank and I have the opportunity to simplify my life, my diet, my expectations and my life in general. As a result I am simply happier.

Living in a third world country is good for the soul if you leave American standards where they belong.

Your Bucket List

Jul7

As a modern day gypsy living from pillar to post was not on my top ten Bucket List items. I had the following dreams instead: I had things on my list like getting an Oscar, writing a bestseller, seeing the caves of Damanhur, going to Antarctica, and winning the lottery, of course. But I won the lottery the minute I said yes to my heart and left normal life, as most of us know it.

I have been having a life on the road that is dotted with awe-inspiring, jaw dropping beauty, kind-hearted people, challenging culture shocks, language barriers and physical limitations. I chronicle how different I feel when I live in the city versus what my body changes into when I live in the jungle here in Costa Rica. Not a day anywhere is the same as the day before.

I have grown to know two certainties in my life: That all you can count on is change. And secondly, that love is the only real human currency. Money can in fact, not matter. When I can focus on these two things then fear can’t take a foothold. If every encounter I have is rooted in love and each moment of change is embraced then there is no way to contract from what life dishes out on a daily basis. Everything becomes a way of learning about self and other, about having and not having, about what the soul truly needs in order to thrive.

This is why I am a gypsy. I value experience far above stability and job security. As a result, my mind cannot become entrenched in the cultural mind, cannot feed on bad news, or really run the show in my life at all. Living and navigating by intuition and a spirit of “Yes” is a heart-based matter. Living in the heart takes courage and is a bit like “spelunking” into caves that are dark and unclear with the full knowledge that you are tethered to a large Universe that has only your wellbeing and growth in mind.

But one of the hidden benefits of living a nomadic life with few possession and estimating real wealth as beauty, spirit, new friends, new opportunity and an adventurous spirit, is it changes your physical chemistry. The body is not a vehicle just to get me from one country to the next, but is completely tuned to the vibration at which I live when I am inspired and challenged. Those experiences raise endorphins, change brain chemistry, metabolism, and virtually every cell in the body.

Living as a modern gypsy insists on total integration of mind, body and heart humming forward as one unit with the life battery being the soul. I don’t know how I could go back to living any other way.

Tic-Toc Tico

Jun21

I have been in Costa Rica for one month and time has evaporated, but my ongoing dewy body has not. When time slips away and you forget what day of the week it is, Costa Ricans call it Tico time, Tico, the name for all the people who are Costa Rican. And I am not Costa Rican, so Tico time is a new concept. I know about Island Time from living in Hawaii; that slow lingering pace that comes from being drunk on the smell of Plumeria. But Tico time is all about “manana, manana and manana”.

For me, it seems to be about putting off till tomorrow what you need done today, but it really amounts to a deeply ingrained feeling that nothing at all is urgent; not leaky pipes, broken air conditioners or in my case, having an order in for internet to be installed filed on April 8 and finally being up and running as of just last week. Tico time is when no one gets the job done till they feel like doing it. “We will be out tomorrow, we have the order I promise you and we will be there” was the mantra for over six weeks.

So this is what I have learned from Tico time: Don’t be an ugly American and intimidate anyone or you will get nothing. And, don’t bribe anyone either (which is a customary expectation for some I am finding out) since word will get around that you use money to get what you want. So, why bother worrying since it doesn’t make anything happen any faster? Get used to standing in line or sitting and waiting for your number to be called if you want to pay the electric bill, for lets say maybe four hours. And most of all, simply do not make plans that you are not willing to adjust, more than once. And let’s not even start talking about people getting anywhere on time for just about anything.

So patience, breathing, laughing, waiting and rejoicing when the air conditioner finally works is a daily prayer. Fifty percent of my day is going to be taken up with things I never spent more than a couple of hours on in the States. But with all the aggravation, I am learning to appreciate everything that comes with Tico time. There is an upside. I walk slower. I don’t hurry or check my watch ever. I cannot afford to get rattled or scowl or complain or get frustrated. So none of that is part of Tico time. As a result of waiting, and trying to be patient, I simply learn to make do, take in what is going on around me, slow down, do with less, be happy with more, and I am more content all the way around. I think the majority of the world who do not live in first world industrialized countries live this way all of the time.

It is a steep un-learning curve here in Costa Rica. For every miracle and flower, rare bird and magnificent thunderous storm there are trade offs. But the trade offs are things I really have come to understand are not really anything essential about life. I can in fact do without an internet signal…the world does not stop revolving and I can simply go down the hill to the Paradiso Café and meet new people, practice my Spanish and use their internet while sipping Costa Rican coffee as the roosters peck around the table. I can do without packaged food, unless I would like to pay $8 for a small container of almond milk. I can do without Pandora and I can do without electricity when there is a storm. In fact I can do without a whole lot of things that when living in the States I thought were essential.

But what I get to live without is surprisingly liberating:

No traffic of any kind and no rush hour. There is nowhere to rush.
Movie Theaters. I read old-fashioned books on my Nook.
Electro-magnetic bombardment of my body and soul. None here. No wires.
Sleepless nights. Without the EM’s, I sleep like a baby.
Pollution both chemical and noise. Now that said the cicadas are deafening.
Accumulation of things not needed. It is all about simplicity here.
Shopping, more shopping and shopping Malls. Need I say more?
Road Rage. But let’s talk about the two lane back roads where you pass down the MIDDLE of an unmarked highway.
Cops, rarely see them.
Speed limits not sure I even know what it is here.
Strip Malls thank god.

What I get to live with has become more than wonderful:

Unparalleled beauty out my front door
Wild and powerful weather every day
The sound of the ocean tides coming in and roaring out
Kind smiling people most of the time
Mother Nature at her finest and in Technicolor
Giant papayas for a dollar
Coconuts with straws for a buck
Fresh everything, and I mean chickens killed at 8am and cooked by 5pm if you eat chicken
No clothes, bare feet, living in the water.
Fabulous skin from the humidity.
Deserted beaches
Going to bed at 8:30pm and parrots rousing me at 5am, not so gently
Living inside of natures rhythm from sunrise to sunset
Being fully present in my body at all times. Having to watch every step I take
Learning to live with the Jungle. The Jungle is alive and has rules.
Animals, animals and more animals. Have not met a sloth yet but they are everywhere
Fruit falling off trees into my lap while I am walking the dog: Starfruit, Mango, Banana and Coconuts
Fresh fish, fresh coffee, clean food everywhere.
My list here is far longer, but you get the picture.

It has taken me my entire life to allow myself to leap into a new way of living that is not “American” at it’s core ( I will be writing about the extensive ex-pat community later). I have finally given myself the opportunity to learn a new language, to pare down everything I thought I needed in life and make room for what is essential; Sun, surf and the pulsating organism that is a jungle. The jungle is prana, it is the life force of Costa Rica. It is the breath of life and like Eden, it is pure and balanced. I think I didn’t really know that my life in the American fast lane was far too hard for me to achieve balance and equanimity. Peace is much more available here in the rainforest that is Costa Rica.

So, I am ready to tell some tales that will make you laugh and hopefully encourage you to take off your shoes and step out of your life for a while. There is a new you outside your box just waiting for a chance to explore our beautiful world which will simply …rewire you and help you to remember who you are.